do you ever just get a vibe that someone has a crush on you and then you’re not sure if they actually do or if you’re just really really self-absorbed
If ever you feel stupid, remember that one time my twin brother forgot my birthday.
things to say during sex
- oops, that was not medicine!
- danke, komerade!
- EVERYONE, I AM ON FIRE
- ANOTHER SUCCESSFUL PROCEDURE
- ooh, money!
- GET BEHIND ME
- ARCHIMEDES, NO! IT’S FILTHY IN THERE!
- TODAY, I AM A GOD
rules for experimenting with bisexuality:
- wear safety goggles and closed toed shoes at all times
- always work in well-ventilated areas
- dispose of bisexual waste byproducts in the appropriate bins
- report any spillage of bisexuality to your professor immediately
- if bisexuality gets in your eyes or skin, flush with cool running water for at least 20 minutes
Anonymous asked: Dude the gamecube sucked
A word of advice to trans women
Go to your nearest target. Buy a two pack of pushup bras (24$ for 2), and target’s bra inserts (12$). Then go to your nearest Walmart and buy the Vasserette Control Shapewear Panties (2.50 each), they do wonders for helping your tuck. There you go! You just saved yourself a lot of money, you can afford to buy enough to wear every day, and best of all you look fabulous. -@twidx
recs for trans women are so rare on tumblr!! spread this, people.
so im shopping for make up for the girlfriend bc valentines day and holy fuck how do you girls afford this shit
$80 for eye shadow???
is it made out of unicorn shit
what is naked 3
why is it called naked
will it make her look naked
why is it $50
that’s 50 cheese burgers
i can’t deal with make up good bye